FANZINE

Do you remember a 1999 Republican primary debate where the candidates were asked who their favorite philosophers were. George W. Bush answered without hesitation, "Chirst." Why? "Because he changed my heart" – and with that wrapped up his party’s nomination. It worked for Jimmy Carter too – remember the Playboy interview where he said he was fallible, that he had sinned in his heart, but ALSO had Jesus there too. That ushered in his Presidency. Hey, the shit works, what can you say. But man if what Herman Cain did the other night after being hounded about sexual harassment allegations pays off then I’ll be President Clinton’s Uncle, giving him a cigar or a blowjob under the table or something.
 

You gotta pull a Samuel L. Jackson Pulp Fiction after that and just blast the press club… Come on Cain, bring up your game a notch -CM